Showing posts with label (in parentheses). Show all posts
Showing posts with label (in parentheses). Show all posts

Thursday, January 5, 2012

(in parentheses) P50

Hear No Evil

 1. Just because I'm standing in front of some cookies, and I'm a fatty , DOESN'T  mean that I was eating those cookies. I have self control.

2. When you're having a bad day, just put on some music, and let it take you away.

3. You know you're totally out of shape when you're doing yoga and it hurts to even keep your arms up :(

4. Please learn how to spell.... PLEEEEAAAAAASSSSEEEEEE

5. Thankyou baby Jesus for making Morning Star veggie chicken nuggets..... and thankyou even more that they taste amazing!!!!!!!

6. Toaster ovens are the bomb. Don't have one? Get one :). You can toast your cheesy bagels, and tots, and your nuggets.... and tons of other things!!!  I want one SO  bad!

7. Also.... get a rice cooker and a crock pot. You'll thank me.

8. The higher your heels are.... the harder you're going to eat shit when you fall...... I've seen it happen ladies.

9. Getting a gift card to Trader Joes is THE best thing ever when you're broke!

10. Don't. Eat. Chocolate. Covered. Bacon. .... ... ........ Just don't do it.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

(in parentheses) P49

Cotton Candy Kisses / pintavelloso


1. I sent out my husband to Costco for groceries. I sent him out with a list and he came back with Chocolate Cherios, a block of cheese, bananas, a big box of cookies, and sweet pumpkin bread. Lol. 

2. Candy is not lunch/or a breakfast. I wish it could totally be, but it isn't.

3. Watching shows like Intervention & I Survived... can really teach you something. Like how NOT  to be a drug addict or how you can possibly survive after you get shot in your head.

4. Dont EVER say that you're not a hipster. Its a trap and you cant get out of the hole you keep making yourself.  Just ignore the question or divert the conversation.

5. I feel horrible after going on a shopping binge and then I look at my bank account :(

6. You know you're bored when you go to YouTube and start looking at UFO and ghost videos... and then you'll regret it because you'll be too scared that night.

7.  Everyone feels bad enough after something horrible happens or your boyfriend breaks up with you, BUT trust me that you'll feel worse after eating all that comfort food and your clothes dont fit :(.

8. I dont care how old you are, you should NEVER get into a strangers car! Stranger Danger!!!!!

9. Put Nutella on everything!!! EVERYTHING ! .... well.... no....dont... lets limit our temptations.

10. I need to go to bed....... neeeeeeeeeeeed sleeeeeeeeeeeeep

Thursday, November 17, 2011

(in parentheses) P48

i want doc martens&160;!


1. As much as I like Christmas, I hate when the retail world starts selling Christmas items in june/july.... or in the early days of October.... Can't we just wait until after thanksgiving ????

2. Old Gaga, pre meat dress, is the best Gaga.... I dont know what happened afterwards :(.

3. If someone gives you something important to do... then you should do it! .... UNLESS  you totally hate that person and they're a mean poopface, then you should take your time and be lazy.

4. Lets try to remember to act our age. Don't be 25 and act like you're 15 or 50 and think you're 20. Lets grow up here.

5. If you're going to pick your nose, do it in the bathroom where no one can see you. Do Not pick your nose at the desk sitting next to me, while  im staring at you, and then touch the stapler I was about to grab.

6. Jillian Michaels is your new hero. Shhhhhhhhhhhh ...... embrace it.

7. Remember, the point of thanksgiving is to eat food....... not to burn the house down making  food. Completely different. Lets be safe and not die, shall we?

8. There is a proper time and place to throw a tantrum. Time: when you're five, Place: at Chuck E Cheese.

9. Yeah, you know you look awesome in those new Dr.Marten boots you got there.

10. Lets not be cheap and buy really cheap nailpolish (and as in cheap I mean either free or anything you find in the 99¢ store.)  because that shit will ruin your nails. Im just trying to protect you. ♥

Thursday, November 10, 2011

(in parentheses) P47

observando


1. If you don't know that coffee bean makes a red velvet hot cocoa, you do now and you should totally get one! AMAZING ! Tastes like you're drinking a cupcake :) yummmm...

2. Do what you  need to do, to make you  happy.... except meth... don't do meth!

3. Make sure that if you're playing rockstar in the bathroom with your hairbrush, to lock the door. You don't want to be totally embarrassed.

4. You're only ready to have short hair when ....1) You become unattached to your locks. 2) You're ok to feel vulnerable 3)You're ok to freak out or possibly accept that you might regret it.

5. For those of you that have perfect eyesight.... appreciate the fact that you don't have to spend at least $200 extra a year on your eyes :(..... perfectly good spending monies.

6. Don't tell me I'm fat, and then  ask me to go to in-n-out with you.

7. Don't you EVER  go to Chilis in your pajamas! Come on guys..... really?!

8.Get out of your comfort zone.... wear some crazy eyeshadow (not too crazy) or lipstick or something!!!!

9.You are your own worst enemy.

10. Stop and admire your nails..... and if you can't admire them, then that means you have the wrong color nailpolish on. :)

Thursday, November 3, 2011

(in parentheses) P46

red-lips-and-heart-candy


1. If you keep dropping your phone... it will hate you and die :( . Just like my phone.

2. You're not alone... I'm here enduring the bullshit too ♥

3. When in doubt, or if you're having an off day, then buy something pretty! :)

4. You know that person that you cant stand? That person that really gets on your nerves and you just want to punch them? ..... Once you meet the person that you hate the most, then everyone else will become a piece of cherry pie. No one will compare and you'll be slower to anger and have more patience. Something good can always come out of something bad.... and if nothing good comes out of it, then that sucks.

5. Why am I so poor ?! (no.... not really... but I just want shiny expensive things lol)

6. You know you're sleep deprived when you can't even remember if part of a memory was either a dream or reality....

7. You've probably  been abducted by an alien... and if you haven't ... you will.............

8. Everyone reaches their breaking point. It can be from anything.... work/relationships/fights/whatever. Its you who chooses how to move on from that.

9. Selena Gomez has a baby head. No one can tell me I'm wrong.

10. I hope you still love me ♥

Friday, September 16, 2011

(in parentheses) P45

Tokyo Heels / Colville-Andersen


1. Eating a piece of pie for breakfast is NOT  breakfast. Sure you can do it, but I'm pretty sure you're going to end up feeling like one of those sad/groggy planets on the Jimmy Deans commercials.

2. A puppy is all you need to fix your problems......... well..... .. not really, but it'll cheer you up!

3. If I can resist shopping for TWO WEEKS then I'm pretty sure that you can do it too ♥

4. Don't paint your nails yellow. It just looks like you have pee on your hands or something. Unless, you can really pull of the yellow look. Which I can't.

5. Its obvious that Forever 21 either wants you to show your underwear through skirts or buy the slips that they sell and make even more money........ (like I don't already shop there enough.)

6. Its always important to look the date that is printed on a letter/card/flyer, because you might be wanting to go to coffee bean and taste their new flavors for free .... and then  realize that it was actually the day before :(.

7. I just realized it was friday.....

8. When someone says that they don't drink, they can either be telling the complete  truth or be completely lying and then get really drunk that same night.

9. I don't necessarily think that you need to break your heels in. I'm pretty sure you have to break your feet in.

10. Always remember that I ♥ You.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

(in parentheses) P44

Pretty in Pink / letty schmiterlow


1. When you think  that you're normal .... and then you realize that you're not and are a freak.... you end up feeling really really small. Apparently  INFJ personalities only make up 1.5% of the whole population, and four other groups/types of  people that are super anal and/or boring make up for 10-15% of the whole U.S each!

2. Never give up! Never surrender!

3. Doing things ahead of time doesn't assure you that you wont get stressed. Like packing something the night before and then forgetting about it the next morning until you figure out that you left that said something.

4. Its ok to give in to something ,sometimes. According to my husband, when we were at Forever 21, he knows that I can't help myself from buying something.

5. Pink food tastes wayyyyyyyy  better than purple food. Purple food just tastes like soap.

6. Rock climbing for 5 minutes will kill you the day after, and you can possibly even hit your face on one of the rocks while you're climbing!.......... but you should still try it!

7. You know how when you were a kid you would swing really high and then jump off? Yeah?  .... well don't do it when you're a grown up because when you land you will break your legs! I tried it...... and it hurt reeeaaalllly bad.

8. Patience is a virtue..... but instant gratification is better :)

9. Don't be scared to dye your hair! You can ALWAYS  fix it by going darker :)

10. You can be 24 and have a nightlight. Its OK.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

(in parentheses) P43

Surprise Kiss | 21 Stunning photos and pictures with a beautiful quote


1. A nacho casserole is essentially  nachos in a glass dish that you put in the oven. I guess it just makes you feel like you're doing something interesting in the kitchen :)

2. BE NICE! Because when you're old and fat, karma is going to come around and kill you for being mean to everybody you knew in your life!!!

3. Everybody gets run over.... ok  well maybe not EVERYBODY .... but if you walk alot then your chances are pretty high. Its just a matter of time! :(

4. Everytime you drop your phone, it will hate you more and more to the point that it will no longer want to do anything for you. People are the same way..... but instead of dropping its yelling.

5. You will  ultimately grow up to be two things and two things only::::  a nice/funny  old person or a mean/cranky  old person..... Let's think about this shall we? .....

6. Don't freak out. Don't freak out. Don't freak out. Everything falls into its place after a while so its going to be OK :)

7. Horrible people are ALWAYS  friends with horrible people... Its the way of life.

8. Finding money that you didn't even think you had are like bonus points!!!!!!

9. If you haven't seen Adventure Time I highly recommend that you do! I'm barely catching up on all the episodes I missed and it makes my day!!! :)

10. Sometimes facing your fears by watching a TV show is therapeutic in some strange way. Its both entertaining and a serious wake up call.

UPDATE::: In my last post of (in parentheses), I mentioned that someone stole my tupperware. Today..... I found them! YES! It was my mean face of an uncle that stole my precious tupperware! He didn't just bring one of them back, but TWO! So today, I will retrieve them!

Monday, August 22, 2011

(in parentheses) P42

Just me, no one else


1. Manicures don't last forever. We can wish it , but it wont come true.

2. When you're phone adds 21 after you type in forever.... then that means that you have a serious problem... just like I do.

3. Having someone tell you stories about alien abductions before you go to sleep is not cool! :(

4. It really sucks when you're away from your job for a week and when you come back all the work is still sitting on your desk because people cant do a damn thing for you or themselves.

5. On that note ::: Try to find a job that will appreciate your work and treat you well. You deserve it ♥

6. Don't steal other peoples tupperware?! WHO DOES THAT!?  "Oh, hey, here is some tupperware. I think I'll take it home even thought its not mine." .... REALLY?!

7. Nutella Marshmallow Empanada. That's all I need to say.....

8. Everything  looks cuter with a bow! Even YOU!

9. Searching everywhere for one thing and having someone find it in two seconds is really embarrassing because they leave you looking like a moron :(

10. Everybody has problems and everyone is messed up in some way. So we're all in it together.

Friday, August 12, 2011

(in parentheses) P41

Untitled / Nishe


1. Its probably  time to actually get an alarm clock, after the third time that your phone fails to wake you up in one week. Thankfully, I have sleeping problems so I woke up and then panicked.

2. You can either be a cheap-o and not  buy new mascara and just add water so it doesnt clump OR you can pay for the medicine you will need when you get that eye infection. Just buy the new mascara!!!

3. What's worse/more awkward? Trying to make eye contact or trying to avoid eye contact? I have the answer! Both! So just put on sunglasses! :)

4. I HATE  wanting to cut my hair!!!! Its SOOOOOOOO tempting!!!!!!!

5.  YOU  wear what YOU want to wear!!!!

6. Remember  ladies... "The eyes are the nipples of the face..." God I love that movie.

7. There is something seriously wrong when a girl uses just one pencil to be her eyeliner, lipliner, and eyebrow pencil.

8. If you havent already tried boba I suggest that you get into your mode of transportation and head over to any place that sells boba.... and then you'll be addicted. ♥

9. Sometimes having enabling friends is the best. Shopping enabling friends, good. Druggie enabling friends, BAD!!!!! You are too  good for drugs! And get some new friends!!!

10. Having facebook notifications sent to your email is horrible.... Especially  when you dont know how to turn them off!!!! :(

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!

Thursday, August 4, 2011

(in parentheses) P40

.8925 / annette pehrsson


1. I always feel like if you want something bad enough and you're sending out the signals to the universe then something will happen. But we have to be realistic here ladies.... no wishing we were princesses or something :).  Also, even though what you wish for something to happen, sometimes you have to help yourself get there and do SOME  of the work!

2. Working at a mall that has Forever 21 in it is the worst. BECAUSE  you just end up spending your money there every lunch break you get!

3. If you flirt with EVERY guy on this planet and then end up really liking one guy, then he is not even going to know you like him because he is just going to believe that its you being you. He's just going to think that he's not special.

4. Why  must we sacrifice??? Why  cant we just have it all?!

5. Health starts from within. BUT within you is you. If you're happy and mentally healthy then you're body will have less stress/any problem and therefore you will be a healthier person.

6. NEVER assume people cant see through your windows! If you're in your car and you feel like your windows are dark enough or that they are magical... You're WRONG! We can see you. Yep, We see you picking your nose! D:>

7. It is a very  real possibility that you can hit your pinky toe on something and almost rip out the whole nail :(

8. Moving into a new place is really exiting! Except if you find out that the place is haunted!

9. On that note : Ghosts and Spirits are real. No.... Don't fight it. Shhhhhhhh. ..... They're real.

10. It is NEVER too late OR  early to buy someone a birthday present :)))))

Thursday, July 28, 2011

(in parentheses)P39

My Space by ~StarryEyed4351 on deviantART


1. What goes around, comes around. ...Like a YoYo.... and it just might hit you in the head.

2. Sometimes a medium bag of popcorn is WAY too much popcorn. Even for two people.

3. You can forgive and forget but sometimes the hurt still lingers there, and that's OK.

4. Whenever I run into my coworker and we're in each others way... I always say "sorry". Once he answered "Don't say sorry! Say MOVE!" Maybe you should try it?

5. If veggie stick chips don't even taste that good compared to regular chips. Then its probably better just not to eat any chips at all. Whats the point in eating a chip that's healthier if it doesn't even taste good? Might as well be EXTRA healthy and not eat ANY chipies.

6. Three things that you can never have too many of: Socks, Chapstick/Lipstick, and Hairties. Always keep those stocked because I lose those like crazy. Especially the socks. Put two in and only one comes out!

7. It sucks when you're super hungry and then you call the tamale man and then you find out his number is disconnected :(

8. Sometimes you just have to put your mean face on so people can take you seriously.

9. Totally start stocking up on sweaters and cute beanies! Because whenever I try to find some during the fall/winter season I find NOTHING! So start early.

10. Feelings are important. So don't let anyone tell you how to feel or make you feel bad about feeling a certain way! You are too important!

Friday, July 22, 2011

(in parentheses) P38

Bluntcard.com

1. It doesn't matter how many times a person says that a shot doesn't hurt, they're LYING! It totally does. Especially if you're getting three of them at one time! 

2. Some people can't help but to be either douchey or bitchy. So i guess we just have to put up with them :(

3. A banana from Trader Joe's will NOT last you a whole week before getting all ugly, soft, and splotchy looking.

4. I assume you're responsible and smart enough to make your own decisions. BUT if you need a little tip. Stop and think to yourself "is what I'm doing stupid?" and hopefully you know the RIGHT answer and don't become a lost cause.

5. Trying to find food when either you're SUPER hungry or completely not hungry is the worst. Either NOTHING sounds good or EVERYTHING sounds good.

6. Telling someone that they've gained weight OR that they're fat is NOT a way to make them feel good or help the situation. Neither is finishing off the sentence with "I'm just telling you so you know." OR "I'm just telling you for your own good." In fact, it will make them feel worse and destroy their confidence and self worth..... mom.

7. Please carry some pepper spray with you or on your key chain. I don't want some yucky old man who is sick in the head to carry you off or attack you!

8. NEVER be a rat. NO ONE likes a rat. If you fall for shit that YOU did, don't take other people down with you and throw them under the bus.

9. If you do something bad to someone who either deserves it or IS bad, then will karma not get you because technically you're doing something good? and technically its karma getting back to the bad person? DOES THIS EVEN MAKE SENSE?!

10. Pain is not weakness leaving your body. Pain is your muscles crying.

Thursday, June 30, 2011

(in parentheses) P37

Bag Ladies / Dave



1. You know when a relationship is bad. And you KNOW when its not going to work. So snip that shit in the bud!!! SNIP IT!

2. Try to have as many emotionally stable friends as you can possibly have. Because then you're just filled with drama queens, flakes, and psychos.

3. Make sure to check that you have no boogers up your nose before an interview! ACTUALLY check that all the time. You dont want some green thing dangling from your nose and making an encounter awkward!

4. If you put your mind to it then you can do it! Of course a little skill helps too, but overall you should be ok. Just remember... Not ALL people can be Astronauts.

5. I need some friends damn it! BEFRIEND ME!!!!!!!!!

6. If its not meant to be once... then is it not meant to be twice????  You tell me....

7. Food poisoning is the best diet. When you get it, just keep on thinking of how great you'll look when you get over it! :)

8. Dont be a douchebag and make plans and then not even have the nerve to cancel or reschedule! At least have the decency to let people know in advance that your ass wont be there.

9. Having a really good manicure can really make your day!

10 AHHHH....... I HAVE A HEADACHE!!!!!!!!!! I cant think anymore.....

Thursday, June 23, 2011

(in parentheses) P36

my favorite colors 23 Whats my favorite color? All of em (34 photos)


1. You can totally survive on $20 for food a week. Yeah you might not like what you eat, but gentlemen,  it can be done.

2. You can't expect people to save you all the time, Sometimes, YOU have to save yourself!

3. I wish that i can carry eggs around and throw them at really crappy drivers that almost run me over! But im scared that i can get arrested for battery or destroying private property or something!

4. NE-VEEEEEEEER watch a movie with Jennifer Aniston in it! You'll die from boredom!

5. Reaching a stage where you become desperate can be both good and bad. Good: it can push you to change and finally reach out and do something new or something that would better you. Bad: Ex: if you're desperate to have a boyfriend and are excited that someone likes you... you'll only be blindsided by your need that you don't notice what a bad choice/mistake you're making.

6 Don't raise annoying kids! My cousins came over to our family party last weekend and i seriously wanted to hit one over the head with a pan so she could shut up.

7. Frenemies? What is that?!?! A friend that is an enemy? OR an enemy that is a friend?  Doesn't matter! Don't have one! NASTYCO!

8. Mexican coke is waaaaayyyyyy better than American coke... Coca ~ Cola (just to clarify). You can taste the difference!

9. You should TOTALLY have a pair of Doc Martens!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!

10. If you're drinking or eating something were there is only going to be a little bit left of that something... you might as well eat/drink it. Don't put that tiny bit back in the fridge where someone will find it and wont even get a full serving of it! Its misleading!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

(in parentheses) P35


1.Whenever you wear a skirt or dress and go to the bathroom, make sure that its not stuck somewhere inside your panties! It also happens if you're wearing a cross body bag near your hips! I've had that happen while i was walking around school and noooobody told me! ALSO, make sure to check your shoes for toilet paper!!!

2. Don't invite yourself into something you were not a part of! YOU LOOK DESPERATE! Its kinda sad when others are having a convo (especially on FB  [ where you dont even have a body presence] ) and be like "invite me?" Have some dignity woman!

3. Once you think you're cool ... you no longer are!

4. If you're going to wear super high stripper heels make sure that you can walk in them first. I'm talking about "walking walking" NOT "looking like you are going to fall on your face walking."

5. It feels good to be productive! So get of your lazy butt and do something!.... ANYTHING!!!

6. Omg.... I really want one of those .99¢ crunchwrap supremes from taco bell .... yummmm...  its not advice but i was thinking about it...

7. Only look at yourself in windows that you are positive no one is behind! Its embarassing when you are looking at yourself and then you see a little face behind the glass looking at you back!

8. Sometimes everyone needs a slap to their face to get them to come back to reality.

9.  Every problem has a solution. It might not be the right one... but you'll come up with one.

10. Words from my brother::

Me: Its so hard to grow my hair! I want to cut it!
Brother: Then why dont you just cut it?
Me: Well i want to try and grow it....
Brother: I dont understand you guys. When you have short hair then you want
    long hair. Then, you go through all of this to grow it and
    then when you have long hair then you say you want to cut it and have short hair.
    The cycle just repeats!
Me: ......... :(

Friday, June 10, 2011

(in parentheses) P34

Untitled / ✂


1. When borrowing someone Else's possessions make sure that you return it in pristine condition. Don't be a whackjob and ruin/tear/break/stain other peoples crap. Ruin your own crap!

2. When you have something really ingenious or witty, make sure you write it down or memorize it! I had something ingenious AND witty to tell you and now i totally forgot :( .. but i had it yesterday :(

3. Don't look at scary you tube videos before you go to bed or take a shower.... you'll scare the crap out of yourself and wont be able to sleep!!!

4. Be careful who you talk to! Because sometimes that 40 year old man that looks normal but isn't might get the idea that you want to be best friends and will want you to sit next to him all the time!

5. Is there something to get the smell of onions of your hands????? Because every time i cook with onions my hands keep the smell for days! ONION HANDS!

6. Sometimes the best way to say no is to run away! JK... but seriously, if you feel bad for saying no to someone you should really practice it. Its healthy to reject people... .... you know what i mean.

7. Everything takes time. So slow down, don't panic, and don't have a meltdown!

8. Take the time to think to yourself and say "What do I want?" You should be very important to YOU!

9. Eating a piece of a chocolate bar a day is ok. However, eating a chocolate bar a day is really really bad for you and you should stop immediately!!!!!!!

10. Remember ladies.... The more make up you wear... the uglier you'll look without it... try to wear make up where YOU still look like the real You.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

(in parentheses) P33

http://img89.imageshack.us/img89/7681/cusl11h itchcock0803hm1.jpg

1. Random acts of kindness are one of the best things that can happen in a day! You should totally surprise someone with a super nice thing! Usually my favorite surprises to give are food.... yep.

2. Follow me @OliviaInOblivia..... (on Twitter) ... See what happens??? We'll see how much crap i can post up lol :).... Do it RIGHT NOW! :)))))

3. Do you ever get scared when you're in the shower?!?!? If you do, you're not alone... Im always paranoid :((( so its ok. You're not a freak... unless.... no one feels like this and then I"M the freak!!!!!

4. OK! Next time that you enroll yourself into college dont forget to read the rate my proffessor page.. Because, you dont want to have a sucky teacher for the whole semester!!! Dont put yourself throught that .. unless you're a massochist..

5. You feel like screaming?!?!?!? then SCREEEEAAAAAMMMM!!!!!!!  (you'll feel much better afterwards)
Pointer::: You should probably go somewhere or do it when you are completely alone because you dont want people think that you are being murdered by mistake!

6. Its intimidating when you can tell that a person can see right through you.

7. If you're adding parentheses to your smiley face, make sure that its either one or more than two ... Because when you put two then you're adding a double chin. NOT ATTRACTIVE! :)) seeeee....

8. Some of us truly are technologically challenged... and its ok....

9. If you ever get a gut feeling (ew gut) you're probably right... If you think that guy is a total creep/douchbag/booger then you are probably about 95% correct.

10. This is a very important conversation:::
Me: Hey, you and me are wearing the same shirt!
Sister: oh, I bought mine at Urban Outfitters.
Me: Oh i bought mine at Forever 21 for $4.50
Sister: Yeah, but mine is soft and will last alot longer.....
Me: ..... yeah

What's the lesson here??? Even though clothes dont last forever... cheap clothes last alot less...

Thursday, May 26, 2011

(in parentheses) P32

Photos for toxic lipstick – Discover music at Last.fm


1. If you end up biting your lip and drawing blood, Its a really bad idea to eat salty foods.... or hot cheetos :(

2. You know that your friend wasn't really your friend when it comes to them saving their skivives and throwing you underneath a public transportation bus! (not literally)

3. Always carry emergency snack food!!! You don't want to be in an awkwardly silent room and then all of the sudden your stomache starts crying for food like a newborn baby bird! EMBARRASSING!

4. Realizing what/who you're meant to be is a weight lifted off your shoulders. Sometimes it takes a long time to figure it all out though but don't worry... you'll get there.

5. If you're going to wear prominent lipstick make sure its on your LIPS and not in your MOUTH.

6. Don't stand kneeling right in front of the doorknob because you might get hit in the eye!

7. If you're going to lie... and you get caught... then you should have a foolproof story behind whatever you're saying...or else you're going to look like a dumb lying cheesehead.

8. Don't ever use the word LINGO....                no.

9. Drunk people make interesting entertainment. Unless they're mean drunks...

10. If a dog is running towards you and you're deathly afraid of it... then may baby jesus help you... because I have no advice for that kind of situation. Except for if you're with someone, then use them as a human shield.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

(in parentheses) P31

Who Mind Don't Matter and Who Matter Don't Mind



1. NE-VEEEEER go out with someone that has a gangsta tattoo on their HEAD. NO! You deserve better than that!

2. Not eating delicious food really sucks.... and it could possibly turn you into a bitch.

3. If you can do it.... Then do it!

4. Sometimes i feel sadness inside when you know a really good person who was basically normal and all of the sudden they become crazy and go wild ... and you just sit there and wonder... what the hell happened???

5. When all else fails.... Have some ice cream and reflect and hopefully the answer will come to you. Harness that Chi.

6. When you feel your stomache turn to acid and it hurts really bad, you know its time to eat some food!

7. When someone asks you "hey, whats your favorite animal?" DO NOT say butterflies. Because you'll look really lame and they wont want to be your friend anymore!

8. I know you secretely want to go on crack... but dont do it! Your face will end up looking 10x worse than what it looks like now! NO NO NO!

 9. ALWAYS cut and separate your lettuce leaves before you wash them!!!! I CANNOT stress how important this is... i was washed my lettuce but i found a freaking bug with its head chopped off in my salad by the time i was almost done eating it!!!! :((((((( SO GROSS!!! So let my lesson be your guide!

10. I think its interesting how you can see a small child and wonder what/who they're going to be when they're older... but you never want them to be a drug addict... because when you imagine that future its just depressing.